Say It Ain't So

by pippa (follow)

I've been medicated daily for 9 long years
It's others who tell me and who have fears
That I will go psycho and ruin their day
I just wished it would all go away

I've been medicated to almost knocked out
Sedated on meds which stopped me shout
I took out my anger on mother and man
Which sent me to the doctor and led to his hand

Prescriptions are plentiful these days
I thought there could be other ways
Never diverge off the pills they gave
Forever trying my best to behave

Psychotic episodes at home still do occur
And my loved ones are the ones who incur
My societal anger and pent up rage
At the decision at 22 years of age

Never to the nut house have I been sent
But at home is where I sit and relent
Still I'm lucky to be treated so I believe
Hope my man will not tire and just leave

I've been good for a while several days
More relaxed and at ease in new ways
Trying yoga and herbal teas and more sleep
Now I'm pregnant and expecting to keep

It has been so long since diagnoses
I no longer think of a clear prognosis
I'm not well and haven't been for a long time
Yet I can be quite happy and pleasantly rhyme

My story has not ended and has just begun
The next chapter with a little one
My baby due in May next year
Oh how I'm hopeful yet full of fear

All I can do is my best
And just forget the rest
Move on and forward
Together we go onward

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